I wrote this article and I wanted to write about mistakes and why I love them. Tell you about how I learned to navigate through mistakes with a positive mindset. Navigating with curiosity and without expectation of a potential outcome in the future. But I deleted the whole thing and I smiled, because what I was about to do was exactly what I am going to write about today.
I had an expectation of what I was going to write about. Leave you enlightened and ready to take on life with a curiosity.
But you know what, sometimes life just doesn’t pan out the way you think it will. That 5 year plan, 10 year plan, how is that going? Is it living up to the expectations you created in your head? It is? And did you check all the boxes? You did? Kudos to you, then my question are you as happy and fulfilled as you expected? I wish that you are, I truly do.
I certainly do not live a life that I expected 10 years ago, fuck 3 years ago. What I am trying to say is, that none of us has a fucking clue what the future holds for us. But we live like we do, like there is a blueprint how to live, do and feel. A 1st-world conundrum if you may.
With all these plans and expectations, we try to map the future to avoid mistakes and suffering. I am not trying to say that living without direction and determination, we all need purpose and goals in life. A North Star to navigate after. But we have to be open on how we get there, if the road changes and stop and smell the flowers on the way. To go back to the mistakes and the suffering, if you are honest with yourself, aren’t these the times you remember most vivid and where you learned what you are and what you are not and what you want and what you don’t want?
That, at least, is my experience. I fucking signed with an NFL team! The chances of this happening is near, if not, impossible. It was a short experience and then I was fired. I was not an NFL player anymore, just like that. But you know what? I did not enjoy it at all. Because all I could think of was, shit now I gotta make it to training camp, and then I have to make it to pre-season and then make it to regular season, and then you see where I’m getting at? I was always in the future, I was not enjoying the present moment. The moment I had devoted my whole life to for so many years. Then after a few month after the firing, I asked my self. If you can’t even enjoy it, why the hell are you sacrificing all your time doing it?
I have gotten perspective on my life and who I am and what I want and what I want to share with you here today. I had mapped out that I was going to be a football player and my future would look like this and this. What I failed to see was that football was only in my life to teach me and shape me. To ready me for what came next in my life. So what I am trying to say is that, we have been taught that "life lessons" have been given many names, such as mistakes, failures or suffering. We don’t know what life has in store for us and all we can do is be open to it. Embrace whatever comes our way, may it be suffering or peace, because life is just trying to teach us a lesson or applaud us for being exactly what we were created to be. If you feel like you know what I am talking about I just want to let you know everything is going to be okay. Embrace yourself.